Archive for May 9, 2008

Matrimonial Advice From A Considerate Husband

      It is  important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder  for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were  younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there’s nothing worse than an over sensitive woman.

My name is Jeff.  Let me relate how I handled the situation  with my wife, Susie.Since I retired several years ago, it has  become necessary for Susie to get a full-time job along with her part-time  job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we  needed.

Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was  beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf club about the  same time she gets home from work.Although she knows how hungry I  am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before  she starts dinner. I don’t yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her  time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have  lunch in the Men’s Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I’m  ready for some home-cooked g rub when I hit that door.

She used to  do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it’s not unusual for  them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can  by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won’t  clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to  motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

Another  symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example she will say that it  is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her  lunch hour. But, boys, we take ’em for better or worse, so I just smile  and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even  three Edays. That way she won’t have to rush so much. I also remind her  that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn’t hurt her any (if you  know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong  points.When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more  rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished  mowing the yard.

I try not to make a scene. I’m a fair man. I tell her to  fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just  sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as  well make one for me too.I know that I probably look like a saint  in the way I support Susie. I’m not saying that showing this much  consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it  impossible!

 Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as  they get older.However, guys, even if you just use a little more  tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will  consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on  this earth to help each other.Sincerely,  Jeff


Jeff  died suddenly on March 1 of a perforated rectum. The police report says he  was found with a Calloway extra long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf  club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing and a  sledge hammer laying nearby.His wife Susie was arrested and  charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 15 minutes to find her  Not Guilty, accepting her defence that Jeff somehow, without looking,  accidentally sat down on his golf club.  

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